It happened quite innocently.
I didn't feel innocent. It felt frightening.
This time, I just couldn't sit still and fight that feeling of running that happens each time this topic comes up in this situation. This time, I raised my hand and straightened out a few misconceptions that floated around that room.
Sunday afternoon, in our women's meeting (we call it Relief Society) we were supposed to be having a lesson on mental health, based on a talk from our last General Conference (see reference below to the full talk). The talk itself is excellent and had to have been very comforting to many members who struggle with this issue.
The discussion didn't stay just on depression. Addiction was brought up as well. Along with all the typical misconceptions that more prayer, scripture study, temple attendance, will help the addict (or the spouse) deal with the issue.
It was along about this time that I must have (figuratively) bolted out of my seat trying to contain my no, NO, NO!!!.
Addiction (like depression) is a condition of the brain and without therapy to re-train the brain all of those best laid efforts to be more righteous will be ineffective. For the spouse, these efforts about being 'more righteous' will not ease the pain, alleviate the chaos of daily life, ease the lies and deception, or that sick to your stomach feeling that happens each time a discovery or disclosure is dealt with.
I'm sure some of the sisters connected the dots of the years of H's inactivity and my admittance of my latest line of work.
Maybe some in the room weren't paying attention and missed what I said.
Maybe some of the sisters heard, and those that have been silently judging will have been made aware.
Maybe some of those in the room will think I am wrong and continue to believe that everything can be cured from being more dutiful in the basics.
And maybe, just maybe, one person needed to hear and will be able to find the strength to reach out and ask how I got help.
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One of the best resources I've read with an LDS perspective on dealing with addiction is Steven Crowshaw's A Clarion Call. You can read that here: http://salifeline.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/A-Clarion-Call-Steven-Croshaw-2012-1-1.pdf
Elder Holland's Talk: The Broken Vessel: http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2013/10/like-a-broken-vessel?lang=eng
You go girlfriend!
ReplyDeleteYou were so brave!!! Have you had any follow-up questions or comments? I tried to make a comment in Sunday School one day on the topic of pornography but choked on my own words...it was bad!.... My daughter had to save me!
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to bring it up. I think it will get easier the more we brave that path.
ReplyDelete